Anytime we interact with someone who has wounded us, the safest place is always in the arms (or at least holding the hand) of our Father. When we are actively trusting Him to meet our needs for love and acceptance, we will be free to speak truthfully with the one who has hurt us deeply.
If we go it alone…, we not only make ourselves vulnerable to be wounded again, we run the risk of being dishonest, manipulative, and hurtful to others. We will be drawn into an attitude of self-preservation and anger, which creates a very hard heart. Hard hearts may protect you from people who have hurt you, but they also close off your ability to love and be loved by the Father. You need a tender, soft heart in order to relate to God and to heal.
If we hide behind something or someone…, we lose a true sense of reality. We think we are safe, but that feeling is only an illusion. In fact, when we begin to cover up our true selves with behaviors or activities or other people, we have become just like our spouses. Scary, isn’t it?
–Melissa Haas, The Journey: Book One